These types of situations arise all to often. The most important thing to do is document everything and seek a court-ordered modification as soon as possible.

Document Everything: It's important to document all the interactions, inconsistencies, and issues you've observed. If the mother has mentioned her plan to leave the kids with you for an extended period to the children but not to you, it's essential that you have that information documented as well. This can include date, time, and what was said or done, and how it impacted the children.

Communicate Directly and Constructively: Try to have a conversation with the mother about the situation. It's essential to maintain open and respectful communication. Be sure to mention your concerns about the inconsistency and the potential impact on the children. You can also ask about her plan to leave the children with you for a few months.

Seek a Modification of the Custody Agreement: If the mother's inconsistent behavior continues to be an issue, and if she is planning to leave the children with you for an extended period, you should seek a modification of your custody agreement. This could give you primary custody, which could provide more stability for your children.

The modification is generally retroactive to the date of filing. Therefore, the sooner it is filed the better. You can address topics such as child support, decision making authority, and parenting time.

For additional resources, see our FAQ on When Can I Modify Parenting Time? and Modifying Parenting Time & Alimony. When you are ready, you can contact our family law attorneys for a free case assessment to discuss your options in detail.